Why You Shouldn’t Ignore a Child’s Expression of Pain
Mental health and wellness is a topic that has grown in conversation over the years.
Many people may have been told to rub some dirt on it when they got hurt at the playground growing up. Today, more and more young adults and adults are recognizing the importance of taking care of not only their physical health but their overall mental health and wellness, too.
It’s common to want what’s best for your child. Parents typically want the same things from their children: for them to be healthy, happy, and safe.
As a parent, you have to find the balance between being there for your child, providing for them, and taking care of them, as well as letting them figure things out on their own to learn and grow.
No one wants their child to be in pain. But you also want them to be able to fend for themselves. That being said, this is why you shouldn’t ignore a child’s expression of pain.
Untreated Medical Conditions
Sometimes, children can’t adequately express themselves or their needs. When your child comes running to you, screaming and crying because they’re hurt, you may not believe that they’re actually hurt. This way of thinking can lead to unrelated medical conditions. This doesn’t mean that every single time your child cries or says they’re hurt, there’s a serious issue at hand. Try paying attention to their nonverbal cues, like their body language, to determine the next best steps.
Lack of Emotional Expression
If you consistently dismiss your child’s wants and needs, they may eventually shut down, leading to them not expressing themselves anymore. Ignoring a child’s needs can break down the communication that you share with your child. They may no longer feel they can turn to you for help or support, especially in challenging times. Suppressing their emotions can be harmful for them in the moment and into adulthood. Suppressing emotions can lead to lifelong problems like anxiety, depression, social issues, and negative self-image.
How to Validate Your Child
The next time your child comes to you with an expression of pain, try to validate how they’re feeling instead of immediately dismissing it. Validating their emotions shows them that you care and want to learn more to understand. Here are just a few different ways to validate your child the next time they’re feeling anxious or stressed.
1. Active Listening
Validating your child means more than just nodding to what they’re saying. Make sure you listen to them and hear what they have to say. This means turning off distractions, turning your body towards them, and asking probing questions to learn more about what they’re saying to you to ensure you understand them properly. Let them know that you’re there for them to support however they may need it.
2. Empathize With Them
Empathizing with your child can help reassure your child that you understand where they’re coming from. Try putting yourself in your child’s shoes. Instead of telling them that they should get over it or move on, try to tell them that it’s okay that they’re feeling sad. Reassure them that it will be okay.
3. Seek Additional Support
As a parent, you want what’s best for your child. All you want is for them to be happy, healthy, and safe. While it may be difficult to see your child in pain, there is absolutely nothing wrong with them expressing it. If you suspect that there’s a larger issue at play, one of the best things you can do is consult a licensed and trained mental health professional. Fox Child and Family Therapy wants what’s best for you and your child as well. Reach out today at 913-229-5691 to set up a consultation.