How to Parent a Strong-Willed Child
Strong-willed children can be difficult to parent. They’ve got a mind of their own, and they’re not afraid to tell us so. They don’t accept what we tell them at face value. They always have to know more. They’re always pushing boundaries. And, of course, they can stress us out a little. After all, how can we parent a child when they argue with us all the time?
It’s possible to parent a strong-willed child well without having to resort to more aggressive parenting. It might seem a little odd, but the best way to parent our strong-willed children is often something we think will make their attitude worse.
Create Routines
By creating routines, we can lessen pushback from our children. After all, we’re not the ones setting the rules. The routine, ideally created jointly with the children, is something we all agree upon and something we all follow. That’s how we can get our strong-willed kids to do things they don’t always want to do, like brush their teeth.
Of course, finding a routine that works can be hard. But it’s worth the effort in the long run. There will be less frustration both on our part and on our children’s. We just have to make sure we include our children in the process of creating this routine. It will make it easier for our strong-willed children to accept the routine if they feel like they helped create it.
Offer Them Choices
This won’t work every time, but if we give our children appropriate choices on many occasions, they’ll do the things we want them to of their own free will. What helps is feeling like they were the ones who made the choice. That autonomy is what strong-willed children need in order to do things they might otherwise not want to.
Of course, as parents, it’s our job to make sure the choices are appropriate. Sometimes it can mean offering them to do certain things in one way or another. But what’s important is that they get to make decisions.
Listen to Them
Strong-willed children know their bodies and minds, and they’ll listen to them. We have to be willing to do the same, even if they’re being difficult. We can try to change their minds later, but we need to make sure they feel listened to and respected. It can be difficult, especially when we feel like they’re pushing us. But it’s worth it.
Teach Through Experience
Strong-willed children learn through experience. And we should let them do that unless there’s a serious risk of injury. It can sometimes be tiring for us, but it’s what’s best for our children, especially when learning about the world. It’s not always easy for strong-willed children to learn, especially when we try to teach them in ways that don’t resonate with them. That’s why, when we know something works, we should stick with it. And letting them experience the world with supervision is not a bad method.
Parenting Struggles
Parenting is not easy. Parenting strong-willed children is even more of a challenge. It’s worth the effort, of course, but sometimes, we can’t do this on our own. Sometimes, we need professional help.
Whether our child is the one that needs help or we do, as parents, there’s no shame in attempting counseling. It can help our children develop in ways that we struggle to support. And it can help us be good parents to our children while still giving us space to express our frustrations and difficulties.
Counseling truly is helpful, and we deserve to make things a little easier on us. It’ll be better for our kids but also for ourselves. Fox Child and Family Therapy is here to provide additional support if and when you’re ready. Reach out today, 913-229-5691.